100 Changemakers for 100 days of BFRB Awareness
My name is Bri, and I am 26 years old. I have had trichotillomania since I was 14. My experience with BFRBs goes before trich, though. Before pulling my hair, I would bite my nails until they were stubby. I have also suffered from anxiety, ADHD, and depression for as long as I can remember. I admittedly told the world I had alopecia because I felt it was easier to blame my body for attacking itself from the inside than it was to say my body was attacking itself from the outside. After all, with mental health stigma, it’s easy to be blamed for something that seems to be controllable. Of course, when I finally came out about my trichotillomania at 19, I was met with “Just put your hand down," “You need to be less stressed,” and many other ignorant phrases because people refused to listen and understand that this isn’t as easy as take some meds, have some therapy and walk away cured.
However, I learned that even with the stigma, I gained a community of understanding and compassion who supported me initially. I now accept who I am and am willing to stand up for those with BFRBs because, though the types we deal with vary, we are all one people just trying to love ourselves and cope with something. A particular light in the BFRB community that I am proud to know is Barbara Lally, the writer of The Trichster Diaries. She has always spread positivity in the BFRB community and provides the most genuine and compassionate support. People like her within the community make the most remarkable change because she shows, by accepting herself, that others can also do it.
I want to be a Changemaker by ending stigma and helping people be less afraid to be their most authentic selves. I want to be a part of my community more and help people feel heard, but I also want them to feel beautiful. We are not ugly, crazy, or incompetent because of our disorders. We are human. We deserve to have our mental health concerns heard just as much as health concerns that are seen from the outside.
Admittedly, I was frustrated in the past about advocating for mental health and BFRBs so much and only being heard by people who know what it is and suffer from it because awareness is about branching out and reaching those who need to learn about it. It made me feel unqualified to make a change or to bring awareness. But now I realize that rescinding my voice to the degree I did means stepping away from the community as well. From now on, as a Changemaker, I plan to share more about mental health during my live streams and by posting on my Instagram and website to help ensure we have an open community where people can be themselves. I also will vote for politicians who will support mental health care and ensure we have more resources to get the support we need, not just for the BFRB community but for all realms of mental health. I will continue to teach people about trichotillomania and BFRBs wherever I go because I have always been open about it off of the internet. Still, because the internet is so vast, I will be vocal about our community and help expand our voices to the best of my ability again.
