100 Changemakers for 100 days of BFRB Awareness
Hi, my name is Amy. I am the reigning Mrs. USA Revolutionary 2024. I am fortunate to be able to share my experiences with the community while wearing a crown and sash, but things weren't always rhinestones and roses! My story started way back in 5th grade. It was an amazing sunny morning, and I was headed to Washington, D.C. on a school field trip to the Air and Space Museum when someone I had considered a friend stuck gum in the top of my hair on my head. I was immediately shocked and mortified by her act and quickly found myself ripping the gum and unfortunately, the connected hairs out in the process, leaving behind a lot of short little pointy hairs. Over the next few days, I became increasingly aware of those short hairs sticking up and began to pull them out to make them go away. This was the traumatic turning point that really contributed to my Trichotillomania diagnosis.
At school, my peers would call me bald eagle and the bullying got very bad, very fast. I was in a very dark place, and I felt alone. I would sit alone during lunch at school, play by myself at recess, and start to shy away from the activities that I had previously loved because of the embarrassment I knew was inevitable from being exposed as having a bald spot. Swimming was now off limits due to my hair being wet and the possibility of friends and my family seeing the spot. Anyone who knows me knows I live in the water!
So, how did I become Mrs. USA Revolutionary 2024 and turn my story into one I am proud to share so publicly? Well, it didn't happen overnight, and it took a lot of pivoting and support. In my teens, my mom put me through modeling classes, and I started to get paid work as a runway and mannequin model. This brought both a newfound sense of confidence as well as new stress, which also triggered my urge to pull. I was soon forced to face the reality of learning how to cover up the spots I was making by creating high ponytails and different hairdos, hats, and other means of camouflage.
It was difficult to maintain relationships with friends and potential boyfriends due to the intense shame I was dealing with and the possibility of them finding out the truth about my disorder. In college, I went through therapy and was able to finally address the lifelong embarrassment and shame I had held inside for so long. I started doing pageants to build my self-confidence and to help my local community. I was met with challenges along the way and had to find my voice.
Learning to advocate for myself was the hardest but most rewarding thing I ever overcame. I started speaking at Toastmasters meetings to build my self-esteem and confidence and learned more about myself and started doing the activities I enjoy once again. I started feeling really good about what I was doing for myself and felt strong enough to start reaching out to others and started sharing my story to give hope for healing to others with similar disorders.
I was asked to be the National Ambassador for the Save Our Monarchs Foundation. Since then, I have been an advocate for monarch butterfly conservation and habitat restoration through providing milkweed seeds to local community and school gardens as well as attending informational panels and community events to further share the mission of the Save Our Monarchs Foundation. Butterflies have always held a special place in my heart since childhood. I am a lifelong Girl Scout and used to collect bugs and watch them to see how they worked. For me, they serve as a symbol of metamorphosis. Each of us has the power to create the life we want to live if we can surround ourselves with the right people and seek out opportunities in which you can thrive. Through much self-reflection and support from my husband and friends, I have come a long way. I have not yet reached full recovery, but I am able to live a life I am proud of and willing to share what I know with others in hopes that they can find healing too.
