100 Changemakers for 100 days of BFRB Awareness
For a decade, I publicly said that the inspiration for "Trichster" came from a childhood friend, but that wasn’t true. I was saying that to protect my sister. The truth is, my sister started pulling out her eyebrows and eyelashes when she was 9 and continued for several years until she was able to stop. It’s only now that she’s ok with me saying it was her.
As a big sister, I felt responsible in a way. I knew this was something that was bothering her, but I didn’t quite understand it myself. This was before Google was a thing and before I even understood what a BFRB was.
Years later, I was living in New York and working at a post-production company, wanting to prove to my boss that I was a decent editor. So, I picked up my little DV camera and went into Union Square to interview people about trichotillomania. Turns out, like me, many people didn’t know there was a word for it, but knew someone who had it.
I started a Kickstarter - this was back in 2012, before Kickstarter was what it is today - and I got donations from 20 different countries. It was clear I had tapped into something much bigger than I thought. I reached out to some local support groups in New York and found Valerie and Sophie, and later connected with Rebecca on Twitter. I gathered four of my friends, and together, the five of us spent our nights and weekends for the next year and a half documenting people with trichotillomania. We got to know the TLC community (now the TLC Foundation for BFRBs), who, after some initial hesitation, embraced us with open arms.
It took me five years to shoot, edit, and distribute "Trichster," which is now available on Amazon and iTunes. It is perhaps what I am most proud of in my life. Not only because it continues to be viewed and used as a tool for new people learning about trich, but because it was such a massive undertaking for a 23-year-old to embark on.
Looking back almost 15 years later, I can’t believe what we were able to pull off. Nearly everyone who worked on Trichster did so in a volunteer capacity. This is a $250,000 film that I made for $30,000 which I raised through crowdfunding.
It was also a launching pad for my film career. I have since gone on to make two other films and am currently writing my first feature narrative project.
Ultimately, "Trichster" is really a love letter to my sister. The one who was so ashamed of something she used to do that I had to tell the world I was inspired by a friend.
In 2012, Valerie and I traveled from NYC to California for the TLC retreat. She stayed at my family’s house overnight before we made the drive to Santa Cruz. Before the drive, we had brunch with my mom and my sister. My sister said to Val, “You know, I used to have trichotillomania.” It was the first time I had heard her say that out loud. That’s the reason I made the film. So that other young girls might be able to say, “I have trichotillomania,” and feel no shame. I hope "Trichster" has helped you feel less shame and that it will continue to show everyone that there is nothing to be ashamed about who we are.
Support BFRB Changemakers
BFRB Changemakers supports BFRB healing through community. Our mission is 3-fold:
- raise awareness of debilitating conditions of Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRBs) such as compulsive hair pulling (trichtotillomania), nail biting (onychophagia), and skin picking (dermatillomania),
- increase and improve access to care, and
- advance community recovery.
Through the BFRB Changemakers Training Academy we strive to increase access to care by offering Continuing Education training to new and seasoned mental health treatment professionals.
BFRB Changemakers is a 501c3 non-profit (EIN #93-1544492). Please make a donation to support these efforts!
